According to a study published in 2013 by the National Association of Home Builders the typical buyer of a single-family home was expected to remain in their property approximately 13 years before selling. This number has been steadily declining since 2009 when homeowners retained ownership of their properties for an average of 20 years.
When some individuals purchase a home they envision themselves raising children, celebrating endless holidays, creating countless memories, and growing old all under the same roof. However, others don't have such a sentimental attachment to sticks, bricks and mortar. Regardless of which end of the spectrum you find yourself, there's no denying that both short-term and long-term memories can be accrued during your time as a property owner.
Making the decision to sell your home isn't an easy task. Sometimes life events outside of our control force a move, or perhaps after careful planning and consideration you've chosen to stake your claim at a different residence for varying reasons. No matter the situation an often overlooked aspect of departing a property is realizing you may have been more emotionally attached than you previously thought.
The physical exertion that is involved with packing and moving is undeniable but you could be underestimating the emotional toll that relocating can take on you or your family. Emotionally disconnecting from a place you hold near and dear can take time but it's an important step in your new journey forward. There are many signals that indicate you are not emotionally detached from your home and these can jeopardize not only your current living situation but your future as well:
Procrastinating Necessary Tasks
Not everyone is an early riser or a go-getter. There are some of us who take our time and carry-out our daily schedules methodically, carefully, and at a slower pace than others can handle. But preparing for a move requires a certain diligence. If you've already received and accepted an offer for your property there has been an agreed upon Close of Escrow date in which you are contractually obligated to vacate the premises.
During the process of packing up your possessions you may find yourself taking a stroll down memory lane far too often allowing yourself to be distracted and hesitant to part from such fond thoughts and recollections. In an attempt to avoid the sometimes overwhelming emotions that can rise up due to a move you may find yourself dragging your feet when it comes to completing the necessary assignments involved in moving. This could put you in a difficult position of being in breach of contract putting your whole move at risk.
Sabotaging the Sale
When you first decided to sell your home you no doubt did your research and selected a real estate professional to represent you. A thorough examination was completed on your property, a value was assigned, and the for sale sign was installed proudly in the front yard.
Potential home buyers will begin their requests to view your property but if you are still emotionally attached to your home the reality of strangers parading through your beloved abode can be difficult to allow. You may find yourself making it difficult for home shoppers to set appointments so they can determine if your house is a good fit for their needs.
Keeping your home as clean and tidy as possible is an absolute must when placing it up for sale. Buyers want to walk in to an uncluttered, well-kept space in which they can begin to envision themselves living. However, if you still have emotional ties tightly wrapped around your residence, you may just find yourself subconsciously leaving a few dirty dishes in the sink or allowing the kids to keep their toys strewn about their rooms. This could end up leaving a bad first impression causing a well-qualified, well-matched home buyer from placing an offer on your property.
If granting access to your home was not a troublesome task and maintaining a sparkling clean living space was relatively effortless, then perhaps you may be a homeowner who undermines your agents efforts when offers on your home begin to emerge. Thwarting a perfectly good purchase offer is another tell-tale sign that you have not emotionally unattached yourself from your current home.
Not all home purchase offers are fair and reasonable. There are those potential home shoppers that will attempt to buy your home for the least amount of money possible and have you pay as many of their loan and closing costs as they can. It's your real estate agent's responsibility to explain each offer in detail so that you can determine an acceptance or appropriate counter offer. But being emotionally attached to your home will cloud your judgment and skew your thinking. You could find yourself making unreasonable demands or being unwilling to budge on any aspect of a home buyer's offer.
Selling a home requires give and take on the parts of the seller and the buyer. Negotiating a fair and respectful deal takes finesse and a readiness to compromise on certain issues. If you find yourself drawing so many lines in the sand that you've boxed yourself in, perhaps you need some help in taking emotion out of the equation.
Selling a home means you'll be purchasing a new one in most cases. Finding a different place to hang your hat takes time and just like your present home each option will have it's pluses and minuses. There is no perfect property. If you're still emotionally attached to your current residence every new home you view will seem sub-par.
Minor imperfections will become insurmountable repairs. Minuscule deficiencies will turn in to deal breakers. Before you know it you'll have toured dozens of properties that would have been a good fit had you not picked apart every microscopic inadequacy until you convinced yourself to move on. Don't fall in to the trap of comparing new homes to the one you're selling especially if you're still passionately connected.
So how do you go about disconnecting yourself emotionally from a property which evokes pleasant thoughts and holds so many amazing memories? It's certainly normal to have feelings of sadness and sorrow when leaving such a warm and loving home. Embracing change isn't an easy assignment especially when that shift means letting go of a place you held so dear. Whether you're an adult or a child, moving away from a beloved residence can require a delicate balancing act to ensure the well-being of all involved.
Where are you going next?
The sooner you begin looking for your new home the quicker and easier it will be to emotionally detach from your current property. Searching and viewing houses can be fun and exciting! There may have been aspects of your residence that you always found lacking and this is your opportunity to make some changes. Perhaps you never appreciated your master bedroom being right next to all of your children's bedrooms. This is a great time to seek out a home with a split floor-plan. Maybe you've been desiring a much bigger yard with a pool and plenty of room to entertain. Now is the perfect opportunity to check off some items that have been accumulating on your wish list!
Explore your new Stomping Ground
No matter how long you've resided at your current homestead you undoubtedly have a list of favorite restaurants, shopping centers, grocery stores, and gas stations in which you frequent around your immediate area. A great way to begin disconnecting emotionally from your home is to try out new coffee shops, diners, boutiques, and markets that will now be your chosen places to visit on a weekly basis.
Every city and neighborhood has it's own special hang-outs and popular venues which all of the locals know about. Take some time to research and test out these acclaimed establishments. Walk the streets of your new neighborhood before you move in to find new parks, paths, and playgrounds. The more you get excited about what your new location has to offer, the quicker your emotional attachment to your old house will fade.
Discuss new Decorating Ideas
Even a "move-in ready" home can use some touch-ups and improvements.Everyone enjoys putting their own personal touches on their house. Selling a home and buying a new one gives you the opportunity to refresh and update your decor. Did you have design style ideas piled up which were never realized at your previous property? Now is the time to revisit those color swatches and samples you saved years ago but never got around to choosing. Purchasing a new home is the perfect opportunity to start picking out new paint colors, draperies, and bed spreads.
If you have a big enough budget, perhaps it's time to ditch that old, worn-out couch and love seat in exchange for a luxurious new sectional and recliner. Did your previous home have gold plated fans and lighting fixtures from the 1980's? Start looking for current styles such as brushed nickel and chrome that you can have installed in your new house. Discussing all the ways in which you want to decorate your new home will instantly begin to help you emotionally disconnect from your previous property.
Emotionally disconnecting from a place you called home can be a tougher task than you think but it's a necessary endeavor we must all embark upon when leaving a beloved residence. Everyone deals with loss differently and moving from a property which was special can feel as if a large piece of you is being left behind. There's certainly no shame in acknowledging or admitting difficulty in detaching yourself from your home.
Taking the time and necessary steps which will allow you to begin mentally enjoying the next chapter of your life can seem like a daunting task but is well worth it in the end.
If you or someone you know is looking to buy or sell a home in Gilbert, Arizona or the East Valley, contact us Today! We are a locally owned real estate brokerage right here in Gilbert and can educate you on the benefits of each community.